today

Today there's things I miss:
- quite times in Togo. The reading, self-reflection, and prayer time that came so easily while being in that cute house on a rainy afternoon.  The time to listen to the local sales-lady screaming about whatever she was selling and the kids laughing outside the gate. Take away the pure trash lying on the streets and the hot humidity - I miss the simplicity of it. I miss the opportunity to dive in to whatever God was trying to show me. 
- the ease of dating.  I have an amazing husband and marriage that I could never replace.  God has blessed us both beyond anything I've ever deserved, but today I find myself (while trying to clean out closets full of boxes) reminiscing about our dating life.  Kyle and I had so much fun in Ruston getting to know each other and "fall in love".  It's funny how at that point I thought I was falling so much in love with him but the longer I'm married, I realize truly what that means. We have faced some junk, that's for sure, and I'm grateful for it.  I'm grateful for the good and rough times that have shown me what marriage and love really are. But today, I miss the little things like the joy of just going to Sonic because one or both of us actually had the $10 that day to go get something that wasn't bought with our "Tech Express" card. 
- not being pregnant.  That's a rough thing to say, I know. But, hear me out. I love having a growing miracle inside of me and I'm SO ready to meet my lil' man. But, for goodness sake, all a girl wants to do is lay flat on her stomach! OR be able to lay on my stomach to get something from underneath the couch. So, I guess I don't miss not being pregnant. I miss not having a watermelon sticking off the front of me. 
- high school and college friendships. Hmmm... enough said. 


But, I can't just mope while trying to sort through the mess I've created by "cleaning out" things around the house. (see, the baby's room was pretty much storage when we moved in... there's boxes in there that haven't been touched since we moved in and now I'm finally trying to sort through it all) There are things that I'm grateful for and looking forward to. 


Today, I'm grateful for:
- my job and new life in Pineville. I never wanted to move here. (NEVER) but we did. It was a rough first year of adjusting for me. I didn't know anyone and I just wanted to find a niche. I'm grateful that I got the teaching position I did and have been able to make the friends I have. We also are loving our Life Group at church.  We're the youngest in the group but are loving the relationships we're making. 
- my dog. Yes, cheesy, but Mister is keeping me sane when I feel like junk. When pregnancy makes me want to be lazy, he doesn't try to coax me out of bed, he just snuggles right up and enjoys the nap, too. He's a bad dog and drives me nuts, but it's cool when dogs realize something's going on with your body. He's mine and Kyle's first thing we actually had "together" and he's pretty dern cool. 
- my house. It's cold, it's old, it creaks when you walk in certain spots. But, it's mine. The floors are (finally) getting insulated this week so maybe it'll warm up. I dig it. 
- the ability to think and do whatever I want in this "free" country. There's a video going around that I've got to post... stirs my thinking. What do I think about it all? Haven't decided... but if you're off today and want to stir your brain, here ya go.

BTW: it's getting real close to baby time. whew!

Blessed

It has been a blur the past few weeks (an understatement for what is in store, I'm sure).  Kyle and I have realized just how amazing of a life God has given us.  From our amazing friends to our ever-loyal families, we cannot ever express just how blessed we are.  

It's been a season of so many things for us.  Christmas came and went in such a fast time that we had to sit and reminisce about what we really did.  We enjoyed Christmas with my mom's side of the family the weekend before and loved getting to see all of that extended family. Christmas weekend we made our annual "Louisiana Triangle" as we call it. To some people, it's crazy to drive that much over three days, but to us... it is our norm.  We left on Friday afternoon at 2pm and headed to Stonewall for dinner and a movie with my parents, sisters, and brothers-in-law.  It's fun to just be "us" from time to time.  We stayed the night there and had our family Christmas on Saturday morning/lunch.  Watching Robin's kids, John Ryan and Nora, get to open and be so excited about their gifts is so much fun!  We ended up leaving Mom's around 2 to head to Kyle's parents to have Christmas with them and his brother.  Again, we love the time with our immediate families. Its a time to slow down and hang out by ourselves, which we don't get often.  Christmas Eve Kyle and I went home to open our "CE gifts" (aka: pajamas!) and headed to bed for a busy Christmas Day.  Christmas Day started bright and early (thanks, Kyle) and after having our last Christmas alone as a couple, we headed to his mom's side of the family for 10am Christmas!  This is such a fun tradition: everyone sits around and reads the story of Jesus' birth followed by singing, there's gag gifts remembering the year's events, and exchanging of gifts starting with the youngest in the group, followed by a fabulous lunch!  Sure enough, we weren't done yet... We left (again around 2pm) to head to Toledo Bend to see his dad's side of the family! Whew! We were there til Monday... yep, at 2! 

Our families are large and we were pooped by the end, but is it so bad to say you have "too much" family to go see? I think not. 

We were home for a couple of hours when two great friends came in to town.  Hunter and Angie and their little Arabella came to visit for a few days.  We spent some much needed time getting acquainted with their 9 week old baby girl and catching up.  Kyle got good practice with baby holding, a gassy belly, and some super sad faces from such a precious baby.  He laughed when she laughed and hated it when she had the hiccups. Yeah... he's getting ready. 

We've gotten to see our little man again and again and I fall more in love with him each time.  He's starting to look squishy in all the right places and I just can't wait to hold him! Some friends of ours, Tim and Wendi, had their little boy just last week and holding someone so small and perfect makes us each that much more impatient! Today, our check-up was great. We've got about 8 weeks left and he's already over 4 pounds! oh my! 

So.... between family and this growing miracle I've got... I'm not lucky. I'm blessed. God has given me  a life I never even realized I wanted. I've had nights laughing late into the night with friends I've only known for a short period of time, mornings where I've needed to sleep off the holiday travels, and afternoons where I've laughed with my husband about the smallest things. I've done nothing to deserve what He has given me and continues to provide me with, but I can say that I am truly grateful.