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Sunday, May 11, 2014

Mothers Day

I'll never forget the Mother's Day of 2011. More importantly I won't forget how that day felt. 

My D&C to end my miscarriage was on March 24 of that year. My first pregnancy didn't make it. It was devastating.

Mothers Day sucked. I remember feeling so incredibly empty. Feeling like nothing could "fix" that pain. I wanted to be a momma so bad it hurt. My mother in law gave me the sweetest card with a little crystal cross. I cherish it. That cross always reminds me of my first Mother's Day and the hope I found in Christ as I sat in church that morning and handed the fate of our family over to Him.

I ache for mommas that don't have a baby to hold on Mothers Day. Not girls or women that don't, but mommas. Because the second that test says positive, you become a mom. Whether it lasts the full 40 weeks or not. From that first heartbeat, you're in love and it's a different love than any other. To all of you who have had a baby return to God before you got to hold them, that pain is deep. I hate you've experienced it. I can only hope you've found healing. 

Handing things over is funny. The next month we found out we were pregnant with Hudson.

Happy Mother's Day, momma friends

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