Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Friday, June 1, 2012
when you're older
Hudson,
I love you. Do you know that? With that being said, here's some things I hope your daddy and I teach you:
- God is first. No question about it. If you're confused about something, just ask him. If I've learned anything in life it's that I should've seen his signs for me sooner and I would've if I was just open to seeing/hearing what He had to say.
- Respect your daddy. I know you're gonna be a momma's boy... we're already getting our good snuggles in daily. But, your daddy loves you so much. He's going to be proud of you every day of your life. No matter if he's acting crazy (which he will) always respect him. Say "yes sir" and "no sir" even if you're fighting mad at him.
- Work hard. Come on now... don't be lazy. You have two granddads and great-granddads who are hard workers and are amazing men. They have hands that show what they've done in life and they can fix anything. There are five men who look forward to knowing you, my hope is that you get to truly know each of them.
- Don't bring home trashy girls. Alright, maybe that was harsh... BUT... The other day I saw this teen-age girl bouncing to a truck to see a boy. Her shorts were SO short and SO tight, I have no idea how she got them on or how they were comfortable. Seriously, do better than that. Find a girl who loves God and respects herself enough to take pride in her body. Be sweet to the good ones and don't cross the line.
- Smile and don't sweat the small stuff. Life's too short, son, to worry. I promise, you're dad and I will worry enough for you for the rest of forever, so it's your job to have fun.
You're amazing. You're a gift from God and every day you have is an extension of that gift. Live it up!
love you my little turtle,
momma
I love you. Do you know that? With that being said, here's some things I hope your daddy and I teach you:
- God is first. No question about it. If you're confused about something, just ask him. If I've learned anything in life it's that I should've seen his signs for me sooner and I would've if I was just open to seeing/hearing what He had to say.
- Respect your daddy. I know you're gonna be a momma's boy... we're already getting our good snuggles in daily. But, your daddy loves you so much. He's going to be proud of you every day of your life. No matter if he's acting crazy (which he will) always respect him. Say "yes sir" and "no sir" even if you're fighting mad at him.
- Work hard. Come on now... don't be lazy. You have two granddads and great-granddads who are hard workers and are amazing men. They have hands that show what they've done in life and they can fix anything. There are five men who look forward to knowing you, my hope is that you get to truly know each of them.
- Don't bring home trashy girls. Alright, maybe that was harsh... BUT... The other day I saw this teen-age girl bouncing to a truck to see a boy. Her shorts were SO short and SO tight, I have no idea how she got them on or how they were comfortable. Seriously, do better than that. Find a girl who loves God and respects herself enough to take pride in her body. Be sweet to the good ones and don't cross the line.
- Smile and don't sweat the small stuff. Life's too short, son, to worry. I promise, you're dad and I will worry enough for you for the rest of forever, so it's your job to have fun.
You're amazing. You're a gift from God and every day you have is an extension of that gift. Live it up!
love you my little turtle,
momma
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| this is how you look at your daddy... don't ever forget to be amazed by him. |
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| I love you even when you cry :) |
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| You and Granddad. |
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Amazing
I finally got an app to blog from. Lifesaver.
I've realized that having my Hudson is taking up lots of time and getting to the computer to write a blog post takes even more time... So, hooray! Hopefully this means more posts more often.
Hudson stats @ 3 months:
Holding head up
Still hates tummy time
Trying to sit up
Sleeps all night (10-6)
Smiles all the time
Coos and squeals
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
I've realized that having my Hudson is taking up lots of time and getting to the computer to write a blog post takes even more time... So, hooray! Hopefully this means more posts more often.
Hudson stats @ 3 months:
Holding head up
Still hates tummy time
Trying to sit up
Sleeps all night (10-6)
Smiles all the time
Coos and squeals
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Sunday, March 25, 2012
What a month will teach you
Being a mom is fabulous. I've learned a few things.
Until next time,
Rachel
- For the rest of my life, any baby shower I go to, I will take a pack of diapers. Always. Good gosh we've gone through so many so quickly and I'm so glad for the TWO diaper showers we had. Wowza.
- I never realized how much life can revolve around when a human being eats, poops, or pees. "When was the last time he ate?" "Was it just wet or did he poop?" Life changing, I tell ya. And yet, it no longer matters if I get to eat or bathe. ha.
- Sleep? What's that? Okay, okay, I can't talk too bad about this part. Hudson sleeps really well. But, just the new type of sleep I get does take a toll. It's weird, this new tired. He sleeps about four hours at a time and when he wakes up at night we're only up for about 30 minutes and that includes eating, changing, getting back to sleep, etc. I think I'm pretty lucky here, but I still feel beat some days. My favorite sleep? When he falls asleep on my chest in the mornings. It's pure perfection.
- Someone really needs me. Just these past few days I've gotten to experience the amazing feeling of being his number one preference. We've been busy (Kyle and I have always been a busy couple) and when Hudson has just had enough and he's a little unsettled, all he wants is for me to snuggle him tight. In the beginning, he loved for anyone to hold him tight up close to their neck, but the past couple days (after being passed around a lot or being in that dumb ole car seat a lot) all that settles him is being close to me. ME! Man, that's just an amazing feeling.
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| Nakedly waiting at the dr's office |
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| common sleeping position - loves to have his hands by his face! |
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| one of my favorites! |
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| Wide eyes! They're so big and brown. And those eyebrows - always expressive. |
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| a little fuzzy - but trying to get him in his Tech gear |
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| everyone jokes that he is so serious when he sleeps - he's a thinker. |
Until next time,
Rachel
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
a little story about my little man
A week and a half ago, my life changed. It's true... becoming a mom is unlike anything else. It's indescribable, overwhelming, humbling, and unbelievably heart-warming. It's unlike anything else in the world. It is, in fact, a miracle.
My Hudson was born on Friday, February 17th. It was a day that was like every other day. But, it was a day that ended unlike I could've ever imagined.
I went to work that morning with an odd feeling in my stomach. I never had a "busy body" living within me during pregnancy, but even my "lazy baby boy" wasn't moving enough for me to be settled. By lunchtime, the words of my doctor on my appointment that Tuesday ("make sure that baby's moving") were ringing so loudly in my head that I couldn't ignore it anymore. I called the office and told them that I wasn't real concerned, but not sure I was okay with the lack of movement I was feeling. Kyle was going to be going out of town for the weekend and I told the nurse that I'd really like to just get some peace of mind before my husband went camping. So, she set me up an appointment for 3 that afternoon to come in for an ultrasound. I called Kyle and he instantly was concerned. He came straight to the school and we had a good talk for a few minutes where I reassured him that I thought everything was okay, but that I just wanted to double check. It's an amazing thing about marriages - one can always calm the other when needed. At this point in the day, it was my job to do the calming.
Kyle came back to school and picked me up about 2:30 and we were so blessed to find out that the lady doing our ultrasound was a familiar face. She walked us through it and kept us upbeat: telling us how this BPP ultrasound worked (it was 30 minutes to check 4 different things), reassured us that fluid levels and heart rate were great, and told us the truth when he wasn't doing everything she needed him to do. When walking out of the u/s room, we were prepared to head to labor and delivery for some further observation. Well, when walking into the exam room to meet with the doctor (who was another one in the office - mine was out for the day), she had different plans. The words I'll never forget came out so loudly and clearly. "Hi, I'm Dr. Babin. I know we've never met before, but today, we're having ourselves a baby."
At this point, it was Kyle's job to do the calming.
She went on to tell us that my precious baby boy's chest didn't move like it needed to... ever. That there had to be a reason for no movement at all during the thirty minute u/s but she didn't know what that reason was other than he had to be in some kind of distress. She explained to us that he was 38 weeks, a good size (over 7 1/2 lbs), and there was no reason to sit around and wait. We asked if we could go home and get our stuff. No. We asked if we could wait about an hour and let my folks get here. Her answer? "They may just miss it." She went on to say how the NICU team would be in the C-section room waiting in case he wasn't breathing well. What?!
Again, at this point, Kyle had to do the calming.
I'm not a panicker. Or at least, I like to think that I'm not. But, I was walking in here just for "peace of mind" and here I was sitting in this room with a doctor I didn't know and she's telling me not only that I'm about to have an emergency C-section but that my baby boy may be in the NICU for a couple of days?! All I could think was that I didn't have my carseat! haha. (our fantastic friends, Hunter and Angie brought it that night!)
The next two hours were a blur. Kyle and I walked out like zombies, got on the elevator and headed down to the second floor, Labor and Delivery. We paused and had ourselves a good hug before walking through those doors, got in touch with our families, and hugged again.
I took a deep breath, stopped crying, and got ready to do this. The staff was waiting on us as soon as we walked through the door. Instantly, we were rushed to a room, I had to gown up, Kyle put on his pretty blue scrubs, and the paperwork began. While they were hooking me up to monitors, starting IV's, taking blood work, etc, here I am having to sign who knows how many pieces of paper. Before I knew it, I was getting an Epidural and being told all about the section process.
Sidenote - my nurse anesthetist, Jared, was amazing. A life saver. He became my best friend who walked me through every step. I made him laugh a lot. (I ask questions and I don't get fussy. Apparently, that's not normal)
5:30 I was rolling in to the operating room and lost sight of Kyle. Thankfully, Jared reassured me that he'd be right there and sure enough he was. Suited up in blue with a face mask and hair net - my husband was about to become a daddy. I never thought about me becoming a mommy in that moment, I just kept looking at him thinking, "this is the day my Kyle is going to become a dad." Maybe it's because I've felt this baby inside of me all along and I have already felt like his momma, but in that moment, Kyle's life was going to change.
Everything was fast, and honestly, not near as painful as I thought it'd be. When Jared said, "alright Kyle, you want to watch your son be born?" I cried. Tears of fear. Tears of excitement. And then, when I heard the most beautiful scream ever... Tears of relief. My baby was born. Our Hudson was born. We didn't need the NICU team. We didn't need any more worry. Hudson was here, screaming and peeing all over the place. 5:59pm was the minute that Kyle and I went from the married couple we've been for almost 3 years to the family of three we will be from here on.
The hospital stay was great. The staff was so nice and everything went so well. Everyone was able to make it "in time". I didn't see my parents before, but they beat me back to my room which was perfect. As I got wheeled in, they were the first people I saw, followed by Kyle's folks right behind them. We learned so much during those few days in the hospital and are still learning as we go along. Kyle and I enjoyed all of our guests while in the hospital (and the ones we've had since being home). Hudson eats, sleeps, poops, and pees just like he's supposed to. Nights go really well - some nights he'll sleep for five hours at a time! Days are even better - eats more often but has some hours of real alertness!
I've been asked a lot how I feel now that he's home or how is it to be a "mom". But I can't ever answer it. "It's great" is an understatement. All I know is that I stare at him all the time and smile. He's perfect.
My Hudson was born on Friday, February 17th. It was a day that was like every other day. But, it was a day that ended unlike I could've ever imagined.
I went to work that morning with an odd feeling in my stomach. I never had a "busy body" living within me during pregnancy, but even my "lazy baby boy" wasn't moving enough for me to be settled. By lunchtime, the words of my doctor on my appointment that Tuesday ("make sure that baby's moving") were ringing so loudly in my head that I couldn't ignore it anymore. I called the office and told them that I wasn't real concerned, but not sure I was okay with the lack of movement I was feeling. Kyle was going to be going out of town for the weekend and I told the nurse that I'd really like to just get some peace of mind before my husband went camping. So, she set me up an appointment for 3 that afternoon to come in for an ultrasound. I called Kyle and he instantly was concerned. He came straight to the school and we had a good talk for a few minutes where I reassured him that I thought everything was okay, but that I just wanted to double check. It's an amazing thing about marriages - one can always calm the other when needed. At this point in the day, it was my job to do the calming.
Kyle came back to school and picked me up about 2:30 and we were so blessed to find out that the lady doing our ultrasound was a familiar face. She walked us through it and kept us upbeat: telling us how this BPP ultrasound worked (it was 30 minutes to check 4 different things), reassured us that fluid levels and heart rate were great, and told us the truth when he wasn't doing everything she needed him to do. When walking out of the u/s room, we were prepared to head to labor and delivery for some further observation. Well, when walking into the exam room to meet with the doctor (who was another one in the office - mine was out for the day), she had different plans. The words I'll never forget came out so loudly and clearly. "Hi, I'm Dr. Babin. I know we've never met before, but today, we're having ourselves a baby."
At this point, it was Kyle's job to do the calming.
She went on to tell us that my precious baby boy's chest didn't move like it needed to... ever. That there had to be a reason for no movement at all during the thirty minute u/s but she didn't know what that reason was other than he had to be in some kind of distress. She explained to us that he was 38 weeks, a good size (over 7 1/2 lbs), and there was no reason to sit around and wait. We asked if we could go home and get our stuff. No. We asked if we could wait about an hour and let my folks get here. Her answer? "They may just miss it." She went on to say how the NICU team would be in the C-section room waiting in case he wasn't breathing well. What?!
Again, at this point, Kyle had to do the calming.
I'm not a panicker. Or at least, I like to think that I'm not. But, I was walking in here just for "peace of mind" and here I was sitting in this room with a doctor I didn't know and she's telling me not only that I'm about to have an emergency C-section but that my baby boy may be in the NICU for a couple of days?! All I could think was that I didn't have my carseat! haha. (our fantastic friends, Hunter and Angie brought it that night!)
The next two hours were a blur. Kyle and I walked out like zombies, got on the elevator and headed down to the second floor, Labor and Delivery. We paused and had ourselves a good hug before walking through those doors, got in touch with our families, and hugged again.
I took a deep breath, stopped crying, and got ready to do this. The staff was waiting on us as soon as we walked through the door. Instantly, we were rushed to a room, I had to gown up, Kyle put on his pretty blue scrubs, and the paperwork began. While they were hooking me up to monitors, starting IV's, taking blood work, etc, here I am having to sign who knows how many pieces of paper. Before I knew it, I was getting an Epidural and being told all about the section process.
Sidenote - my nurse anesthetist, Jared, was amazing. A life saver. He became my best friend who walked me through every step. I made him laugh a lot. (I ask questions and I don't get fussy. Apparently, that's not normal)
5:30 I was rolling in to the operating room and lost sight of Kyle. Thankfully, Jared reassured me that he'd be right there and sure enough he was. Suited up in blue with a face mask and hair net - my husband was about to become a daddy. I never thought about me becoming a mommy in that moment, I just kept looking at him thinking, "this is the day my Kyle is going to become a dad." Maybe it's because I've felt this baby inside of me all along and I have already felt like his momma, but in that moment, Kyle's life was going to change.
Everything was fast, and honestly, not near as painful as I thought it'd be. When Jared said, "alright Kyle, you want to watch your son be born?" I cried. Tears of fear. Tears of excitement. And then, when I heard the most beautiful scream ever... Tears of relief. My baby was born. Our Hudson was born. We didn't need the NICU team. We didn't need any more worry. Hudson was here, screaming and peeing all over the place. 5:59pm was the minute that Kyle and I went from the married couple we've been for almost 3 years to the family of three we will be from here on.
The hospital stay was great. The staff was so nice and everything went so well. Everyone was able to make it "in time". I didn't see my parents before, but they beat me back to my room which was perfect. As I got wheeled in, they were the first people I saw, followed by Kyle's folks right behind them. We learned so much during those few days in the hospital and are still learning as we go along. Kyle and I enjoyed all of our guests while in the hospital (and the ones we've had since being home). Hudson eats, sleeps, poops, and pees just like he's supposed to. Nights go really well - some nights he'll sleep for five hours at a time! Days are even better - eats more often but has some hours of real alertness!
I've been asked a lot how I feel now that he's home or how is it to be a "mom". But I can't ever answer it. "It's great" is an understatement. All I know is that I stare at him all the time and smile. He's perfect.
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| Hudson and Mommy |
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| Hudson and Daddy |
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| Hudson Kyle Sasser 7lb 13 oz; 22 inches long |
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| headed home! |
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| getting ready to go |
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| all ready in the car! |
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| Proud Daddy! |
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| First morning hanging out in the bed after a great night's sleep! |
Monday, January 16, 2012
today
Today there's things I miss:
- quite times in Togo. The reading, self-reflection, and prayer time that came so easily while being in that cute house on a rainy afternoon. The time to listen to the local sales-lady screaming about whatever she was selling and the kids laughing outside the gate. Take away the pure trash lying on the streets and the hot humidity - I miss the simplicity of it. I miss the opportunity to dive in to whatever God was trying to show me.
- the ease of dating. I have an amazing husband and marriage that I could never replace. God has blessed us both beyond anything I've ever deserved, but today I find myself (while trying to clean out closets full of boxes) reminiscing about our dating life. Kyle and I had so much fun in Ruston getting to know each other and "fall in love". It's funny how at that point I thought I was falling so much in love with him but the longer I'm married, I realize truly what that means. We have faced some junk, that's for sure, and I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful for the good and rough times that have shown me what marriage and love really are. But today, I miss the little things like the joy of just going to Sonic because one or both of us actually had the $10 that day to go get something that wasn't bought with our "Tech Express" card.
- not being pregnant. That's a rough thing to say, I know. But, hear me out. I love having a growing miracle inside of me and I'm SO ready to meet my lil' man. But, for goodness sake, all a girl wants to do is lay flat on her stomach! OR be able to lay on my stomach to get something from underneath the couch. So, I guess I don't miss not being pregnant. I miss not having a watermelon sticking off the front of me.
- high school and college friendships. Hmmm... enough said.
But, I can't just mope while trying to sort through the mess I've created by "cleaning out" things around the house. (see, the baby's room was pretty much storage when we moved in... there's boxes in there that haven't been touched since we moved in and now I'm finally trying to sort through it all) There are things that I'm grateful for and looking forward to.
Today, I'm grateful for:
- my job and new life in Pineville. I never wanted to move here. (NEVER) but we did. It was a rough first year of adjusting for me. I didn't know anyone and I just wanted to find a niche. I'm grateful that I got the teaching position I did and have been able to make the friends I have. We also are loving our Life Group at church. We're the youngest in the group but are loving the relationships we're making.
- my dog. Yes, cheesy, but Mister is keeping me sane when I feel like junk. When pregnancy makes me want to be lazy, he doesn't try to coax me out of bed, he just snuggles right up and enjoys the nap, too. He's a bad dog and drives me nuts, but it's cool when dogs realize something's going on with your body. He's mine and Kyle's first thing we actually had "together" and he's pretty dern cool.
- my house. It's cold, it's old, it creaks when you walk in certain spots. But, it's mine. The floors are (finally) getting insulated this week so maybe it'll warm up. I dig it.
- the ability to think and do whatever I want in this "free" country. There's a video going around that I've got to post... stirs my thinking. What do I think about it all? Haven't decided... but if you're off today and want to stir your brain, here ya go.
BTW: it's getting real close to baby time. whew!
- quite times in Togo. The reading, self-reflection, and prayer time that came so easily while being in that cute house on a rainy afternoon. The time to listen to the local sales-lady screaming about whatever she was selling and the kids laughing outside the gate. Take away the pure trash lying on the streets and the hot humidity - I miss the simplicity of it. I miss the opportunity to dive in to whatever God was trying to show me.
- the ease of dating. I have an amazing husband and marriage that I could never replace. God has blessed us both beyond anything I've ever deserved, but today I find myself (while trying to clean out closets full of boxes) reminiscing about our dating life. Kyle and I had so much fun in Ruston getting to know each other and "fall in love". It's funny how at that point I thought I was falling so much in love with him but the longer I'm married, I realize truly what that means. We have faced some junk, that's for sure, and I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful for the good and rough times that have shown me what marriage and love really are. But today, I miss the little things like the joy of just going to Sonic because one or both of us actually had the $10 that day to go get something that wasn't bought with our "Tech Express" card.
- not being pregnant. That's a rough thing to say, I know. But, hear me out. I love having a growing miracle inside of me and I'm SO ready to meet my lil' man. But, for goodness sake, all a girl wants to do is lay flat on her stomach! OR be able to lay on my stomach to get something from underneath the couch. So, I guess I don't miss not being pregnant. I miss not having a watermelon sticking off the front of me.
- high school and college friendships. Hmmm... enough said.
But, I can't just mope while trying to sort through the mess I've created by "cleaning out" things around the house. (see, the baby's room was pretty much storage when we moved in... there's boxes in there that haven't been touched since we moved in and now I'm finally trying to sort through it all) There are things that I'm grateful for and looking forward to.
Today, I'm grateful for:
- my job and new life in Pineville. I never wanted to move here. (NEVER) but we did. It was a rough first year of adjusting for me. I didn't know anyone and I just wanted to find a niche. I'm grateful that I got the teaching position I did and have been able to make the friends I have. We also are loving our Life Group at church. We're the youngest in the group but are loving the relationships we're making.
- my dog. Yes, cheesy, but Mister is keeping me sane when I feel like junk. When pregnancy makes me want to be lazy, he doesn't try to coax me out of bed, he just snuggles right up and enjoys the nap, too. He's a bad dog and drives me nuts, but it's cool when dogs realize something's going on with your body. He's mine and Kyle's first thing we actually had "together" and he's pretty dern cool.
- my house. It's cold, it's old, it creaks when you walk in certain spots. But, it's mine. The floors are (finally) getting insulated this week so maybe it'll warm up. I dig it.
- the ability to think and do whatever I want in this "free" country. There's a video going around that I've got to post... stirs my thinking. What do I think about it all? Haven't decided... but if you're off today and want to stir your brain, here ya go.
BTW: it's getting real close to baby time. whew!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Blessed
It has been a blur the past few weeks (an understatement for what is in store, I'm sure). Kyle and I have realized just how amazing of a life God has given us. From our amazing friends to our ever-loyal families, we cannot ever express just how blessed we are.
It's been a season of so many things for us. Christmas came and went in such a fast time that we had to sit and reminisce about what we really did. We enjoyed Christmas with my mom's side of the family the weekend before and loved getting to see all of that extended family. Christmas weekend we made our annual "Louisiana Triangle" as we call it. To some people, it's crazy to drive that much over three days, but to us... it is our norm. We left on Friday afternoon at 2pm and headed to Stonewall for dinner and a movie with my parents, sisters, and brothers-in-law. It's fun to just be "us" from time to time. We stayed the night there and had our family Christmas on Saturday morning/lunch. Watching Robin's kids, John Ryan and Nora, get to open and be so excited about their gifts is so much fun! We ended up leaving Mom's around 2 to head to Kyle's parents to have Christmas with them and his brother. Again, we love the time with our immediate families. Its a time to slow down and hang out by ourselves, which we don't get often. Christmas Eve Kyle and I went home to open our "CE gifts" (aka: pajamas!) and headed to bed for a busy Christmas Day. Christmas Day started bright and early (thanks, Kyle) and after having our last Christmas alone as a couple, we headed to his mom's side of the family for 10am Christmas! This is such a fun tradition: everyone sits around and reads the story of Jesus' birth followed by singing, there's gag gifts remembering the year's events, and exchanging of gifts starting with the youngest in the group, followed by a fabulous lunch! Sure enough, we weren't done yet... We left (again around 2pm) to head to Toledo Bend to see his dad's side of the family! Whew! We were there til Monday... yep, at 2!
Our families are large and we were pooped by the end, but is it so bad to say you have "too much" family to go see? I think not.
We were home for a couple of hours when two great friends came in to town. Hunter and Angie and their little Arabella came to visit for a few days. We spent some much needed time getting acquainted with their 9 week old baby girl and catching up. Kyle got good practice with baby holding, a gassy belly, and some super sad faces from such a precious baby. He laughed when she laughed and hated it when she had the hiccups. Yeah... he's getting ready.
We've gotten to see our little man again and again and I fall more in love with him each time. He's starting to look squishy in all the right places and I just can't wait to hold him! Some friends of ours, Tim and Wendi, had their little boy just last week and holding someone so small and perfect makes us each that much more impatient! Today, our check-up was great. We've got about 8 weeks left and he's already over 4 pounds! oh my!
So.... between family and this growing miracle I've got... I'm not lucky. I'm blessed. God has given me a life I never even realized I wanted. I've had nights laughing late into the night with friends I've only known for a short period of time, mornings where I've needed to sleep off the holiday travels, and afternoons where I've laughed with my husband about the smallest things. I've done nothing to deserve what He has given me and continues to provide me with, but I can say that I am truly grateful.
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