9 months

The first year of life for a wee one is amazing isn't it? I'm trying to remember monthly milestones. This month has an underlying tone... exhaustion.

whew.

Dearest Maddox,
You are nine months of living proof that God answers prayer. You're proof in miracles. You're proof that love can come in any package. You're always going to be my test of strength. Not the same strength it takes to raise your brother, but my test of my strength while standing wholeheartedly in faith that bigger things are yet to come for you.

This month you are:
on more meds...
moving legs more independently while on your back
watching more intently from eyes to mouth
showing your extreme preference to be with your momma
a full 16 pounds
needing 9 month clothes (you're long kiddo)

and... that's a smile.
Geeze the emotion that just took over just writing that. I debated proclaiming this. It's not consistent and it hasn't been when just looking at me yet. It happens when I tickle your feet a very specific way. But it's enough of a grin to get me through these next few months. It's not real big and cheesy, but there's a precious dimple right below your nose and your eyes... those precious eyes are pure perfection. Oh my sweet babe. We were in the hospital with your first round of pneumonia and our amazing preacher Brother Steve had just left from visiting you. He prayed over you and as he left, I told him how I ached to see a smile across your face.  I was very honest in telling him that physical impairments are on the back burner for me. I needed to see that you were happy. He walked out and I started playing with you.

Here's the highlight of the past few months.

So, what next?
I'm praying daily to see that grin again and again. I'm prayerful that you'll look right at me and not need a tickle. That you'll just show me those big ole green beauties and smile.

love you Maddox-man